Possible side effects include dying

Last week, at our bi-weekly men's/women's group meeting, MJ says she has good news and bad news to tell me.

MJ: "The good news is: I have great car insurance."
(and she saved a bunch by switching to Geico!)
me: "uhhhhhh...."
MJ: "The bad news is: I think I backed into your car."

After checking it out, it turns out to be nothing more than a minor scratch. Nothing to write home about.

The next day, I find out some disturbing news...

MJ: i told the w's gp about it
MJ: i said of all the guys at the exodus, i'd want to hit ur car
MJ: we all tht about it,a dn they agreed too
MJ: so it's agreed among the women if we have to hit someone's car, i'ts gonna be urs
MJ: sorry dood
me: what the heck
me: i don't want women's grp to hit my car!
MJ: sorry
me: imma park like 4 blocks away and walk from now on
MJ: it's acutally a compliment
MJ: b/c it means we think u're hte nicest
MJ: most easy going
MJ: most likely to be insured/responsible
MJ: least liekly to get mad
MJ: least materialistic/care about ur car
MJ: so really u shoudl be glad women's gp wants to hit ur car
me: great
MJ: you're welcome!

Telling someone that 'all the women would rather hit your car' and then convincing them it's a Good Thing &trade is a true mark of an attorney. You have truly found your calling, MJ.

But, back to the point, this unforeseen consequence of being a Nice Guy &trade is like when your parents say you have to finish your dinner of liver before you can eat candy. And then they give you candy liver.

Okay, so it's not like that at all. But I still don't like it.