what i learn in law school

 

The problem with being a superhero is there are always people trying to steal your arc reactor. I got stabbed. Or some wild party goers spilled red wine on me. Twice.

I'm impressed that I was able to get the stain out though. I googled it and found some site that said mix hydrogen peroxide with dish washing liquid. I did it twice and let it soak in the sink overnight.

 

Dude, how awesome is that? I know. I'm so domesticated. But Tony Stark has to win Pepper Potts somehow, right?

McGreed

(at McDonald's: as my order comes out at the register, the person next in line turns to talk to me)

Lady: "Excuse me, do you play the game on the cup?"
(thinking) I'm not giving you my pieces, lady! Get your own!
Me: (smile) "Yes."

it's a stereotype cuz it's true

The other night, I joined nobu and his friends at a bar for dinner. There was this Marlboro girl who was giving away free USB drives. All you had to do was let her scan your ID and answer a survey. When asked, she said it was 2GB.

Apparently I smoke non-menthol Camels, which I buy by the pack. Everyone at our table signed up and got a free flash drive. We were the only Asian table at the bar.

The lady must've remembered us, because later she brought another Marlboro guy who was doing the same thing. Being Asian, and seeing an opportunity, we all signed up. Again. And got another flash drive. Apparently he didn't care that we had already signed up. He even filled out the survey for us.

After getting home, I plugged the drive into my computer.......and it was only 512MB. Lies! All that for only 1GB.

At least I have 2 buy-one-get-one-free Marlboro coupons.

Model T's bachelor party

I've never been to a bachelor party. Where there was a dress code. And an 8 course meal. And I had to wait one hour for a train on the way home. In the freezing cold. Until now.

 

We met a nun.

 

We missed the train by literally 30 seconds. The next train came one hour later.

as long as they wear pjs

Is it weird to let someone you don't know use your sleeping bag? I've never heard of anyone with this issue, but apparently some people think it's weird.

fortune to follow

I'm famous!! And international.

http://lamomparis.blogspot.com/2008/10/merci-cherie-et-jeff.html

for ages 26 and up

My friend KL:

Yale graduate.
Current student at NYU Law.
As a kid, sent two requests everyday (the maximum allowed) for free McDonald's Monopoly pieces. And used to dig through the trash to find more. All because she "really" wanted to win the $1,000,000.

The other day, we went to McD's and discovered that Monopoly was once again upon us. KL wanted a game board. So she took one.



Notice the instructions in the upper left hand corner.



This is the end result after KL "opened" the board.

Voltron

The new Macbook has two graphic chips. That automatically combine when more power is needed. To fight evil.

All my childhood dreams are coming true! I'm gonna live to see Voltron!

what to write for minority scholarship essays

Why do I get mistaken for a delivery boy any time I'm carrying food? This city is so racist.

Although to be fair, a Chinese guy thought I was the delivery person too. Racist Asians.

Hello, Dave

Tonight was the first time someone has ever prayed for me. Using the wrong name.