Everyone is either cool cool, nerdy cool, dorky cool, nerdy nerdy or dorky dorky. Don't blame me, I just found this out myself, recently. If you are nerdy cool, at heart you are a nerd, but you are a cool nerd. If you have no coolness, you are just nerdy nerdy. Get it? Yeah, me neither. Anyway, apparently, I'm dorky cool.
I object, your honor! (see? I'm good at this. Are you law school application people reading this?). Dorky cool?!!! I'm not cool at all.
Since this blog is all about exposing the truth (see Truth 1 and Truth 2) I'd like to take this moment to clear up this gross misunderstanding.
First of all, I'm a Comp Sci major. COMP SCI. Not only did I feel the need to be a Comp Sci major, but to kill any lingering coolness germs (sometimes it's hard to wash off) I went and got a graduate degree in Comp Sci. Still not satisfied, I went ahead and got a Software Development job. How does that make me cool? It doesn't.
I like video games. And sci-fi movies/tv shows/toys. I read books (usually sci-fi books). I watch Anime. And love it. I have no sense of style, and at the moment, no desire to go out and obtain one (to the chagrin of my cousin EL who is forced to give me awesome haircuts that I'm not able to make look good). I do Sudoku. I play logic games with my family. I play card games, and buy games like Bang! and Settlers of Catan. I like chess (even though I suck). I want to become better at chess.
Some of you right now are trying frantically to think of reasons why I'm still cool. (thanks for the effort, Mom, but it's futile). Face it, you guys are either related to or friends with a nerdy dorky guy. (Or you're stalking me, which will probably stop after this post)
"What about your motorcycle?" you may ask. "You're (marginally) good at (some) sports!" you may cry.
Look, people. I originally was going to get a scooter before I was convinced otherwise (by some cool cool people). The only reason I even ride a motorcycle is because it's fun and it saves me time. If the only way for me to get through traffic in LA was to wear motorized roller skates, I would do it (as long as it was fun). I didn't get a motorcycle for the cool factor. I got it for practicality.
And I'm not good at sports. For some reason, I just have a high metabolism, which makes me skinny and able to sprint. That's it. I don't train. I don't work out. Without my metabolism, I'd be 50 lb. heavier. And not able to move as easily.
So in reality, all this talk about me having any semblance of 'coolness' is just hogwash. I'm a nerdy dorky guy with a high metabolism.
Ask my college roommates. They'll tell you. (You can also ask my brother or my sisters, but they're biased. Against me. So it's more believable coming from neutral third parties.)
(I'm not saying people who do the things I do or like the things I like are not cool. I'm just saying I'm not cool. There are tons of people with similarities to me that can pull off being cool. I'm not one of them.)
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10 comments:
your reverse psychology is not going to work
geek chic!
sorry, you're dorky cool for sure, not dorky dorky. more evidence:
--your presence at a group function or in a car makes it more fun
--you watch tv shows like prison break, 24, lost, and bachelor rome
--you're able to mobilize a group to do something just by virtue of deciding to do it yourself (e.g., vegas last december most ppl weren't gonna go and somehow at last minute bunch of us went)
--you're terrible at trivial pursuit
--you've written a post that somehow compels me to respond by listing examples of how cool you are. dood what the heck am i doing.
--you almost didn't graduate with your compsci degree cuz you were too cool to study, do your homework, or go to class
--you went to OSU and USC, two of the premier sports programs in the country. i went to college where they invented football but are now terrible, and law school that doesn't even have a football team
good grief, now i'm writing about how you're especially cool compared to me. ackckck! stop typing, mj!! stop!
For the record, I do not watch The Bachelor: Rome.
Who says you're skinny?
I was just about to ask about The Bachelor thing. Because then we would have a whole different issue unrelated to being cool or not cool. Instead, I think the question that would need to be asked is, "Am I sure all the girliness vanished when I cut my long girlish hair?" And the answer, we all know, would have to be a sad no.
yeah, i'm not arguing with your points in this blog. my only question is, who has been saying you're dorky cool?
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